Following last week's enormous loss, this week I lost 2lbs.
Given that it's another step in the right direction, I'm pretty chuffed.
I have a confession: I lapsed last week. As I'm sure I've mentioned before, I spent two days in London at the start of the week tidying my room and handing in the keys to my flat. There's no place in the world I love more than London and it hit me pretty hard when walking to the tube station for the last time that I wouldn't be living in the city again for quite some time. I'm not an emotional person, and I hardly ever cry, but as the train pulled away from Euston I developed a huge lump in my throat, the tears in my eyes came dangerously close to spilling over and the businessman opposite me at my table clearly didn't know what to do with himself.
In the past, I would have immediately began to blindly comfort eat without fully realising my actions. Luckily, that didn't happen as for some unknown reason I managed to listen to a tiny voice in my head that told me it wasn't worth it. However, my willpower wasn't strong enough to stop me completely lapsing and I ended up having a glass of wine while watching The Grand Budapest Hotel. Then when I got home I had a cappuccino and a crumpet smothered in strawberry jam. It's not a terrible lapse in the sense that I didn't mindlessly eat everything in sight, but I did make the conscious choice to come off the programme and pull myself out of ketosis. LighterLife Total only works properly when you stick to the programme as it's intended and fully abstain from conventional food. Maybe if I'd been in a different mindset and exercised a lot stricter self-control I wouldn't have acted like I did. In fact, realistically there's no "maybe" about it: the outcome would have been completely different.
It's hard not to be immensely disappointed in myself.
(IMAGE SOURCED FROM www.instagram.com/inspirationatalie)
Over the last few days I have been making a point of reminding myself that nobody's perfect, and if I expected to follow the programme right through to management not lapsing once then I was seriously deluded. I'm once again putting too much pressure on myself, which I know from past experience will make me fall off the wagon spectacularly if the temptation gets too much. Yes, I lapsed, and yes, it happens, but as long as I definitely don't make a habit of it over the next few months then the odd wobble on the programme isn't the end of the world. As long as I get straight back on it, don't use it as an excuse to quit and don't make myself feel horribly guilty about it, then I have no doubt that I can turn it around and keep losing.
(IMAGE SOURCED FROM www.facebook.com/ELLEuk)
In a perfect world I wouldn't be tempted to lapse and I'd stick to the programme fully from start to finish. But I'm only human, and what happens in reality is never exactly as it is in theory. As long as I acknowledge every lapse, work out why I did it, and make sure I don't repeat that sort of mistake again in the future, then I don't see a problem.
At the end of the day I still lost 2lbs, and I've now comfortably passed the 2 stone mark. Getting to this stage in 8 weeks really isn't something to be sniffed at. Here's to another imperfect and challenging 8 weeks!
WEEK 8 LOSS: 2lbs
TOTAL LOSS: 32lbs // 2st 4lbs
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