I'm rarely ill, but when I am I feel absolutely terrible. This week I've been ill.
It all started out so well: I felt fine at the start of the week and it was business as usual with my LighterLife packs and water. I then had a planned lapse on Wednesday when my mum came to visit where we had breakfast at The Breakfast Club in Angel and afternoon tea at The Orangery, Kensington Palace. As with graduation, I didn't eat or drink anything over and above exactly what I planned to - so in my book it was a successful lapse - and I found that by five o'clock in the evening I was disgustingly full. My stomach has shrunk over the last seven weeks and I really struggled with two meals, finding myself unable to finish the afternoon tea. This would never have happened seven weeks ago, and if anything I would have probably still have been hungry. By sticking to my plan and drinking lots of water, when we got home after seeing Miss Saigon that evening I felt fine and more than ready to get back on track the next morning.
Calm before the storm...
That's when everything went downhill. On Thursday I woke up full of cold, with a blinding headache, a raw throat, sharp shooting pains in my ears and a head that felt full of cotton wool. I'm assuming it was both a reaction to eating conventional food the day before - this time around my sugar and dairy consumption was a lot higher than my previous lapse - and the fact that I've really been struggling with my flat this summer. It has no sense of temperature regulation: I can go from shivering and wrapped in blankets to having all windows open, two fans on and every door propped open in a vain attempt to get a breeze as it feels like I'm living in the Sahara, all within a few hours. It's almost as if my body's been staving off an illness all summer but a cold has been lurking dormant, waiting to pounce when I least expected. On Thursday it struck, and to say I felt awful would be a bit of an understatement.
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My tastebuds have been shot to hell and I couldn't stomach any of the LighterLife packs. I felt enormously sorry for myself and couldn't find it in me to summon any type of willpower to stay on the programme when I felt so rubbish. I caved, ran (shuffled) to Waitrose and bought cranberry juice, strawberries, and packs of layered vegetables. I spent the remainder of the week curled up in bed with an enormous box of tissues, bumper pack of orange Vitamin C Strepsils and alternated between watching 30 Rock and sleeping.
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I'm pleased I didn't buy anything particularly unhealthy - my wildest purchase was some Tyrell's popcorn - and I didn't binge at any point. I think the fact that I felt a little sick all the time ensured that couldn't happen. However, the whole point of LighterLife Total is complete abstinence from conventional food. It doesn't matter that I lived off vegetables and several punnets of strawberries in an effort to have as many vitamins as possible to fight the cold, eating food that's certainly not going to kill me or sabotage any form of a lifestyle change still annoyed me as I lapsed properly and ultimately didn't have the willpower or energy to stop myself.
I'm aware that being ill is different to just deciding to give up, but I'm still frustrated. I'm not 100% better now, but well enough to be back on the programme. I started properly again yesterday, and so far I'm getting on okay.
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I'm not entirely sure how the last week has impacted on my weight loss. I moved back to Cheshire on Sunday too and am still in the process of finding a LighterLife group up north that suits me. The one I thought I could go to has apparently closed, so it's all a bit up in the air at the moment. I have food packs, but am not too sure what's happening with the sessions and getting weighed for now. To get round this, I set up my set of scales on the flattest and hardest surface at home and weighed myself for the first time at 6pm last night - the same time of the week I was weighed in London. I've made a note of this figure and will be using it as another starting point. As they're a different set of scales I'm not sure I trust the difference between this week and the last. It looks like I've maintained, but I wouldn't be surprised if I've actually put some weight on.
So I'm taking it that I've lost 1st 7lbs in London, and I'm now starting to count weight loss in Cheshire from the new figure this week. It's irritating, but it's the best method I can come up with at the moment! Anything I've potentially put on this week will hopefully be corrected by a loss next week, so in the long term I know everything will even out and head in the right direction.
Hopefully I'll have something better and more positive to report next week...
WEEK 6 LOSS: N/A
TOTAL LOSS: 21lbs // 1st 7lbs
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