I am really, really happy at the moment.
Life seems to be ticking over in the best possible way and it's total Sod's Law that the minute I stopped desperately searching for ways to be more content, grounded and focused everything fell into place and sort of happened without much effort. I think I've been wasting so much time trying to reach a vaguely-defined end goal and making my self increasing miserable as I drifted further and further away from it that I forgot to enjoy the journey and just live. I've come so far with my head but I still have an overwhelming number of moments where I won't allow myself to relax and properly embrace life because I don't think I'm quite at the right stage to do so. I know how ridiculous this is - and how if I keep waiting for the correct time I'll never do anything and only lament the 'what ifs' - but it's a pretty difficult habit to break. Luckily, over the last fortnight I haven't really had the time to carefully consider every single action and decision I make, and instead I've had to trust my instincts. Almost without realising I've prioritised my head, my health and my mental wellbeing, and I haven't sabotaged my progress on any front half as much as I feared. I'm not entirely sure how I've managed this, but I'm not complaining!
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It's because of this ridiculously positive mindset that I've felt ready to make a move on the weight loss front. I need another challenge to sink my teeth into, so last night I signed up for Slimming World online. It's not a programme I've ever really considered - aside from a small stint in Sixth Form I've not given it much thought - but it seems like everyone I know is doing it to varying degrees of success, so I figured why not give it a go? Like the 90 Day SSS before it, I've read hundreds of success stories and while that one didn't exactly work out at all how I would have liked I don't regret trying it out. At this point I don't have a clue what will work for me, so I think I might as well pick something new and see where it takes me. After all, what's the worst that can happen?
(GIF SOURCED FROM www.buzzfeed.com)
Another disappointing transformation-style appointment didn't give me the answers I was hoping for this week, hence why I took the Slimming World plunge. I've been so tempted to go back to LighterLife (no matter how much I detest the thought of the packs again) merely to drop as much weight as I can as quickly as possible. However, I've come to the conclusion that maybe I should stop focusing purely on fast weight loss - and hating myself when I'm not in the zone - and instead turn my attention to a longer term, slower solution that will allow me to enjoy the journey and live life relatively normally. There's more to life than losing weight, and I think I'd completely lost sight of that fact. I need to stop letting it take over my life! Maybe the psychology of doing this slower, and over a longer period of time will finally give my body a boost?!
(IMAGE SOURCED FROM www.instagram.com/thedailymark)
So that's where I'm at! Now I've signed up for Slimming World I need to get my head round it all, so this time next week I'll either be ready to start or already have a few days on plan under my belt. If my revelations over the past few days have taught me anything it's to trust the process and to stop rushing. What will happen will happen, and I have every confidence that I will end up exactly where I need to be at exactly the right time.
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