It's been a tiny loss on the scales, but I've achieved a much more important victory when buying clothes (I'll give you a clue: everything fits!).
I've carried on exactly as I intended to this week with the 5:2 and ended up losing half a pound. I feel really uncomfortable celebrating such a tiny loss - does it really count as a loss?! - but I suppose every little helps, right? I'm coming round to thinking that even though it's only half a pound it's a clear indication that I'm steadily clawing my way back to where I was a couple of weeks ago, whilst laying the groundwork for continued loss in the future.
(GIF SOURCED FROM www.buzzfeed.com)
So really, it's not too shabby of a result at all.
(IMAGE SOURCED FROM www.instagram.com/grazziepinto)
Sadly, I have very little else to report on the weight loss front. My head's in a really good place, so although I'm not being overly strict on myself with food and thus fully in 'weight loss' mode, I'm still focussed. At the moment I'm allowing myself the odd cappuccino and slice of gluten-free bread (total revelation - not dying every time I eat bread is a wonderful experience) every couple of days and not beating myself up about it. I want to start tightening my boundaries over the next few weeks but right now I'm not overly concerned: I want a bit of a break from stressing over food. However, although I may not be making the most saintly of choices for every single meal, I'm not frying anything; I measure out every ingredient I use; I haven't eaten anything particularly bad; and there's been no bingeing of any kind. I may not be an acting like a complete angel but I'm certainly no longer a devil with regards to food.
(IMAGE SOURCED FROM www.instagram.com/refinery29)
The only other notable event has been further success shopping. I remember having to buy black trousers and a pencil skirt when I worked at the Queen's Theatre a couple of summers ago. By this stage I'd started to let my weight get away with me, and I remember having to frantically run around London trying to find the required clothes when I found out I'd got the job. I must have tried on hundreds of pairs of trousers in the space of a couple of hours, feeling thoroughly demoralised with each and every pair that didn't zip up. Most shops I went in didn't stock clothes that would actually fit, and even then when I finally found a shop that did - M&S to the rescue yet again - I still had to visit a couple of different branches trying to find the larger sizes. I did eventually manage to buy both trousers and a skirt, but I felt awful in them. They were unforgiving in the extreme, and so far out of my comfort zone I didn't feel I could hide in them. I think the only reason I didn't let myself become totally consumed with how uncomfortable they made me feel is because I worked with a bunch of the loveliest and kindest people I've ever met. They - unwittingly - never gave me the opportunity to drown in my head and spend all summer fretting over my appearance.
Today I went shopping for work clothes again - just a couple of skirts - and feared the same sort of scenario. I know logically I'm significantly smaller and am therefore no longer restricted by sizes offered in shops, but I was still a little shaky and very, very dubious that I'd actually find anything that fitted (let alone that I actually liked). Well, it turns out I now have my pick of the entire shop. I'm now definitely not on the extremes, meaning that whatever I picked out (I was always wrong when I did - I'm smaller than I thought) had multiple sizes both above and below what I guessed I'd need. Annoyingly, though, I'm now between sizes so things don't fit quite how I'd like them to: everything's either slightly too big or only just does up. Even so, the fact that I could walk into a shop and come away with clothes that fit without any faffing, having to order in other sizes, or having to compromise based on what little was actually available is a pretty magnificent feeling indeed.
(GIF SOURCED FROM www.buzzfeed.com)
It's like the jeans week all over again, but even better because these fabrics don't stretch! Woop!
WEEK 43 LOSS: 0.5lbs
TOTAL LOSS: 76.5lbs // 5st 6.5lbs
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